[What It Means To Play The Role] [PG-10] [Adventure] [Videogame] [RPG]

What It Means To Play The Role

Written By J. J. Bartel. PG-10 Adventure Videogame RPG Copyright 2023

 

A college student wearing a headset playing a top-down asymmetrical sword and sorcery game was shaking his head. He unmuted his mic and asked, “Really? Our hordemaster ain’t coming?” 

In the game, a silver-haired, black-clothed figure emoted a shrug. “We dined and dashed last week, and I was faster than Doc. He’s working for the next week for free as punishment.” 

“Really, Nietzsche? We needed the Demon Wolf event ring that gives an 11% damage buff to all our attacks. It’s ending tonight in less than an hour. If we couldn’t beat that demon dog with three, how could we beat him with two? Philosophize that.” He emoted a boxing stance, and the ranger in a green tunic began airboxing the digital goth. 

“Well, Nikola, we only need one ring. The issue is not beating the boss; it’s dealing with all his minions. I will change my build to perfect crowd control. I will send you a re-stater so that you can go with the max physical damage build.”

“So somehow you’re going to do crowd control while I am the glass cannon archer?” 

“Why not? Our builds last time were very magical. This was meant to be taken on with warriors, so it was a bad match. Come on, 5 minutes, and we raid this doggo one last time? You are an engineering student. This thing can’t be too scary after those watt equations.”

The engineering student looked at the ticking-down clock of the dungeon. There was only 30 minutes left to try one more time. He shook his head, saying, “Fine, in five minutes, I finish this pizza, we raid this thing, and if we fail, I will give you a real existential dread to despair over, you philosopher.” 

In a different apartment, the philosopher was controlling the silver-haired character. He typed a few keys and sent his friend the re-setter for the stats. He clicked on his own. He put on the garb of a druid with extra flame and demonic resistance. He then put his points into parrots and their echoing chatter trait, a few for summoning cooldowns, a few to raise his magic, and his last one into a particular skill. He clicked on it with a smile. “With that,” he said to himself, “New character, new me.” he turned to look at a picture on his desk. It was him, his engineer friend, and their other friend who was going off to become a doctor. 

They both entered the dungeon together. 

The engineer archer said over the microphone, “Alright, I did as you suggested. What are you doing?” 

“Front and mid-range buffer Druid Summoner.” Immediately, two massive wolves came running, each with one leg limping. They were a mix of dull sword grey with eyes, nose, and tips of the feet and tail colored dried blood red. The Goth Druid summoned with two summoning circles, five parrots each. They looked like the same species with black and white beaks and cheeks, but five were green and blue, shimmering with life, while the others were rainbow-tinted with fire-red feathers. Thankfully for Nikola, there was no friendly fire, so he could begin shooting the summons. One arrow tipped with watery energy defeated each of them.  

“Really! Parrots? The weakest summons in the entire game?” The engineer on the other end shouted.

“Max-level parrots create Great Green Macaws that heal HP and MP and remove status effects constantly. The red ones are Great Scarlets that weaken monsters. If the weakest summons are the key to beating the big bad doggie, why not use them?” 

“Ok, it was by a lot, considering that those Lesser Dips died in a single shot.” 

“Yeah, for now, stick with water. When we get to the boss, use light.” 

The two characters moved through the rest of the room. The emo druid kept summoning an ever-increasing horde of parrots so that there were over 30 of each color in the room with them. Halfway through beating the room, the archer stopped shooting elemental arrows because all the buffs and debuffs were overpowered. They reached the door for the second room. 

Over the headset, Nikola said, “Ok, the parrots worked really well for the first room. I have no idea how they will work for the second room.” 

“Give me a second, and I will fulfill my role. After all, why wouldn’t I ?” Nietzsche said over the microphone. He unsummoned the Great Scarlet Macaws. Over 15 birds disappeared. 

He heard a sarcastic snort on the other end. “You want a list, Mr. Nihlist? The dine and dash that got our friend in trouble for one. That’s not the only time you have stiffed us with a bill. Growing up, we got detention more than once, playing along with one of your stunts. You’re OP in games, but you, IRL, could use a buff.” 

“We had fun,” Nietzsche said. His character opened the door, and they entered the next room. “I will send some of the parrots ahead. When they trigger a trap tile, it will take time for that trap to reset.” 

Five green birds flew ahead and were immediately skewered by spike walls. The damaged birds turned to a puff of green smoke while the spikes retracted. The two characters moved to the triggered trap area. More Macaws triggered spikes, pits, and death arrows. The room was sweltering and started a burn status on the characters. The constant influx of green birds meant they kept healing the characters of burns and found their health staying at max. They encountered a new kind of beast while going through the dungeon. This large dog had a mane of orange fire, blood-red eyes, and a white underbelly and paws. Two came close and began to breathe a black and orange fire, killing several birds in a single breath. The emo druid kept summoning birds faster than the monsters could kill them. The archer used a single water arrow to take down each one. 

“Your crazy strats are actually one-shotting the Huodous. Insane. We are actually healing up as we are going through this room.” 

“In life, roles are much more flexible. You got to trust me on this.” 

“Like doc?” 

“Look, I’m sorry that I got him in trouble-” 

“It’s midterms next week. Midterms! He should be studying! How can he ace his midterms if he can’t attend any of the study sessions? We both know that profs put secret questions in those extra classes. If he can’t get those, he will not earn an A in the midterms! Most of your pranks and jokes are harmless, but this …” He shot another Huodou, defeating it. “Hurts, man.” 

Frustrated, the philosopher bit his lip, then said, “I’m almost ready for the final room.” By this point, there were over 60 squawking birds onscreen. It was getting harder to see what was going on. “Give me a minute; I want to hit a horde max of 100.” The emo druid was now summoning green and red Macaws. 

“Can’t give you two. Dungeon will collapse in less than 10.” 

When the emo druid filled the room with green and red birds, with the player’s heads barely sticking out of the feathered horde, the philosopher could not help but snicker at the sight. The engineer smirked with him, and his character emoted, pretending to drown in parrots. The Philosopher also hit the drowning emote, and they started laughing over the mics. 

When they caught their breath, the philosopher said, “Let’s go.” 

The archer opened the door, and they entered the final room. There was a massive sleeping beast in the center, and it awoke. The game showed its name, Gwyllgi, and a vast health bar. There were so many birds in the room that it was hard to see what it looked like. In a fury, it howled, and portals opened up, spawning Huodous and Dips without the limp. They began to cut down the numbers of the birds. The archer started to shoot light arrows, killing the monsters quicker than the boss could spawn them, so the archer used light arrows on the boss. The massive health bar began to shrink more and more. All the druid was doing was summoning birds as fast as he could. However, when Gwyllgi’s health bar dropped halfway, he began to howl more, summoning more monsters even quicker. He breathed a black fire with red and purple embers, vaporizing entire flocks of birds in one go. 

“I can’t summon the birds fast enough!” The philosopher shouted. 

“How much longer?” The engineer asked. “I’m running out of magic!” 

“Don’t worry about minions. Just target the boss now!” 

The glass cannon archer switched focus to the boss spamming abilities and attacking Gwyllgi. The archer could see the boss’s health bar shrinking to one-fifth when his mana bar dropped to 0. He had to keep dodging the ever-increasing maws of Greater Dips and the smaller fire breaths of the Huodous. 

Yet the swarm of monstrous wolves threatened to erupt over the pair. 

The philosopher shouted, “Do you trust me!?”

“Sure!” The engineer shouted without hesitation over the mic. 

“You shouldn’t, but you will now!” The philosopher exclaimed, clicking the first of two yet unused abilities on his screen. The first one immediately summoned a massive flock of Great Green and Great Scarlet Macaws, and the Dips, Houdous, began targeting the birds instead of the players. Boss Gwyllgi reared his head to breathe his black and purple-red fire at the archer. If it hit, he would perish. That’s when the philosopher clicked the second button. His HP and MP shrank rapidly, buffing the glass cannon archer, doing three times the damage to the boss. The boss also switched targets from the archer to the emo-druid character. An inferno of midnight lava gushed over the emo druid, and his hit points dropped even faster. 

The philosopher shouted, “Abyss, I’m glad you stare back. With our staring contest, you won’t see Nikola finish you off. 

“Firing Ult!” The engineer exclaimed. On the philosopher’s screen, he could see a powerful arrow of water and light blasting into the boss, obliterating his health bar. The body began to shimmer and fade away, and with that, all of Gwyllgi summons. The loot fell to the floor, and the engineer started to pick up his share. 

“I got it! The Ring of Demon Dogs! Come and – !” The engineer said. He looked around through his character but could not see the emo druid. “Where are you?” 

The philosopher leaned back in his chair and said with much relief, “I’m back at the entrance. I died fighting the boss.”

“But you-” 

“Yes,” The philosopher smiled. “I can’t collect any loot if I die in a dungeon. That ring is yours, man. Keep it forever.” 

“Ok, no prank to take it back?” 

“No more schemes, no more dining and dashing, no more dark and twisted pranks.” 

The engineer on the other end remained silent. He didn’t know what to say, but the philosopher continued. 

“Look, man, I finally get it. Role-playing games are all about the role cause each role has strengths and weaknesses. I have been asking myself why it’s so fun. I then realized something when I watched Doc get caught by the waitress. Part of the fun isn’t just trying to minimize weaknesses. It’s overcoming challenges despite your weaknesses. It’s trusting that your friends have your back. You only have to be perfect if you’re alone, after all.” He sighed. “Somewhere along the line, it got all twisted up. Somehow, perfect became better than you two. I don’t know why. It’s wrong, man. I’m done gazing at my life and it gazing back in disappointment.”

“Finally, you sound like a philosopher Nietzsche.” 

 I … I … just don’t know how to turn this around.” 

“Well, you could return to that restaurant and help him out starting tomorrow.” 

“I guess that could work. Doc could use the break for once.” 

“We all could. You have been a Nietzsche for too long. It will be good to have our Socrates back.” 

“I’m looking forward to it too.” 

“Looking or gazing?”

“Shut up!” The philosopher said with a grin. He took his headphones off and shook his head. “Shut up, Nikola. There you go, inventing another happy ending.”

“What can I say? It’s nice fulfilling this role.”